Wednesday, April 26, 2006
7:05 PM
disclaimer: if you continue reading this, promise me that if you go mad you wouldnt implicate me.
today popped by music room, climbed the stairs for the first time in years? hmm. the place is so freakin clean now. you have to take off your shoes to enter. i want to swear like shit. and i saw anna loo at her "beautiful mahogany desk" enjoying the comfort of the cool nice beautiful room. the choir even hung a sign on the door that says "rgs choir." SHIT. i am so completely pissed off. so what if they got gold with honours? ever heard my rant about unfair competition? it's not that we're not good enough. it's just that there are others who are even BETTER. get it? it is true if you actually think about it. if those BETTER people dont get out of the way, the good people dont have a chance to shine. get it? you'd better. i've been feeling murderous these few days ever since friday sherry "screamed at us" according to yiusummie. yes murderous. dont come within 10 metres of me when there's a knife at hand or your life might just end there and there. im pleased with myself? fcking not. oh shit. swearing has become like a habit already. but if i dont swear would you understand the impact of what im trying to say? swear words help rants sink in faster. do you agree? im so assertive and and. shit. argh. im losing control of my life.
What is the Matrix?Control.
The Matrix is a computer generated dreamworld built to keep us under control in order to change a human being into this. [Morpheus holds out a battery to Neo.]-- (Morpheus from The Matirx (One) tells Neo)we all feel the need to have control in our lives. without a system, we feel lost. the study of human nature is an interesting thing. why why and why? what why how? questions that have no answers. never can have any satisfied answer.
the next time you come the juniors might have changed the password to prevent me from ranting and rambling. if you actually think about what i write, you'd probably go crazy like what is going to happen to me soon. all too soon. so the next time you see "im kweky xx" as the title you may want to scroll down for some lighter hearted posts, albeit all about co and daji maybe. certainly not life. no one's as cranky crazy and cuckoo as me. encouragement for me? better not do it. you might just lose your life. im morbid. good. think of me as morbid. good. if you were to do a brain scan on me to see what's inside. you would regret it totally. too totally. because you definitely wouldnt want to know what goes on under the layers of hair, dead skin, skin, fats, muscles, flesh, skull of mine. definitely. keep guessing. you might hit jackpot. i wish i had einstein's brain though.
i wish that owls really could bring our letters. then i wouldnt have to walk across the whole of block d and down one level just to ask janice something or what. and i wouldnt even think of climbing up to the fourth floor to talk to the sec twos. and i wouldnt have to stretch all the way to block j to call on some more juniors. i can just throw the owl out the corridor and my message will get to daji-ians in a matter of seconds. of course, this is all so impossible. do me a favour, if you ever become a neurologist or something, go tweak some bird brain and make it deliver letters. thanks. i will thank you by flooding your office with love notes painstakingly carved in blood. arent i wonderful to you? goodness. imagine the bloody blood and ants crowding around to suck the sweet sweet sugar in my blood. imagine it. WOOTS.
next year for philo we're debating on God. according to ms grace lim aka mrs mao. it should be funner than falacies. RIGHT? i really hope so. in sec two i thought fallacies would be funner than euthanasia. [capital punishment was okay] euthanasia totally bored me to death. if that person want to die then let him/her die lah. sheesh. whats there to debate about. condemn me.
i delight in scaring the daylights out of people with my morbidity. thanks you! my classmate told me im the inspiration for her character in ld play. im so honoured. im inspiration because im quiet and and. quiet. yea baby yea.
you have to belive in what you say for others to even take your words seriously. first time i had a takeaway from a cle lesson this year.
tomorrow got social studies. the most wonderful subject ever. absolutely. because of our absolutely wonderful old and wise and experienced teacher. (: [sadistic smile]. pray for me because im going to turn into a zombie after ss tmr. (: [sadistic smile again]
if you think you know me, you're gonna go: "o.o who is this blogging? are you sure it's kweky? this sounds so impossible." maybe? well maybe not. maybe you'd be too accustomed to my eccentricities [my my im not eccentric! i really am different. im not different just for the sake of it..] anyway, just for the sake of no better word, eccentricities to mind this much. you might just think this is kinda extreme. (:
blogging is just a temporary relief. after blogging the stress will just come all rushing back again. it was the same doing library duty too. work myself out. but at the end it all comes rushing back again. relief doesnt work. i need to solve the problem. but the Other problem is that im too lazy to solve The problem!. wonderful? absolutely.
eating is a chore. you understand? eating decreases the time left to do other stuff eg prac yun luo, use the com, study [which is not applicable in my case]. we should just eliminate the idea of eating. afterall everything is not what it is. we may be eating shit [ie. feaces] but our brain interpretes it as delicious smelling tempura with terriyaki sauce.
today im like totally stoned. why? i dont know at all. i have no fcking idea. i was so slow stamping and borrowing books. there's like a white veil with no end point around my mind and brain. obstructing my view of "reality". i finally gave up my slowness and let tricia the great do it. she's fast AND efficient. unlike me. RIGHT?
if words could kill many people whould have been dead by the end of this post. likewise if looks could kill you would have been dead before you could even think "kweky". im feeling extremely sadistic and dramatic right now. but do not doubt these are what i think all day.
woots. this must be my longest entry ever in my whole blogging history (: all about rants. ranting rocks, apart from the fact that readers might go mad from reading rants. ^^
i love you but you dont love me?